Seth Rogen would be a perfect actor to cast as a serial killer. He is so friendly, funny, and completely non threatening that seeing him turn scary violent would be chilling.
That’s why Sin City was so good: nobody expected Elijah Wood to be that damn creepy.
(Source: reddit.com)
#renaissanceman
(Source: fuckyeahexistentialism, via cognitivedissonance)
“The greatest thing since sliced bread,” should now be changed to “The greastest thing since Neflix’s ‘SKIP INTRO’ button”.
But the worst thing since “auto skip credits” should also be a thing (any Rick and Morty or Bojack Horseman fan can attest).
(Source: reddit.com)
Look, I said I was “back”, I never said “I have spare time”.
Owning a car is super weird. Not being able to drive that car just makes it weirder.
Don’t get me wrong - I CAN drive the car. Just haven’t passed my test yet. But I’m fast discovering both how much work a car is, and how much it isn’t told to you.
Today, for the first time, I removed the car battery. Sadly, Carlos (my Chevrolet Kalos, aka mah boi) got a little neglected lately, and I forgot to keep moving him about daily, so his battery died. As an aside, it’s mainly because the petrol is running low, and I as an L plated driver can’t exactly just get in and take it for petrol. So I had a choice: run out of petrol and be boned, or let the battery die and be boned in a different way - a “time to learn to maintain a battery” kind of way.
The battery can, naturally, be recharged - and outside the car, too. But that means taking it out, and it is a battery covered in warning signs. Literally. So, I’m technically a Millennial (according to the definition that states “born in the 80s coming to maturity in the 90s and early 2000s”) and did what any Millennial would: I looked up a guide on Youtube.
Youtube is literally my car advice saviour. When I took out my shitty head unit (stereo) to replace it with a more capable cheap and cheerful unit based around the idea “people have MP3s and Bluetooth streaming devices now” where did I find out how? Not the manual, for sure, but a Youtube video (that wasn’t in English, but hey, I got the gist of it). So I figured “taking the battery out? There’ll be a video.” And yeah, sure there was - fake electrocution effects to show what not to do, proper advice, general advice. Battery? BatterOUT more like.
But how the heck will I charge it? The same way I got a new stereo. Amazon. A million results later, my standard filter set (Prime, 4* and over, sort by average review) and standard rules (second shittest/cheapest) gives me a charger that’s been heavily discounted that the review rule (read a good one, read a bad one, repeat twice) proved to be good for the job.
I can’t even drive yet. Well, not alone and/or on the roads. But I’ve replaced the stereo, looked at getting a set of matching tyres (listen, you pay <£500 for a car? That it has a set of tyres, unpunctured, with a good set of trim on the whole tyre? Good enough) fit a car mount for my phone to act as a sat nav, got a USB 3.0 Fast Charge 3.0 cigarette lighter socket mobile charger, audio cable for attaching an iPod (an old one with a headphone port, because I HAD <£500 TO GET A CAR WITH HOW GOOD AND MODERN DO YOU THINK MY GEAR WILL BE) and now bought a charger for inevitable battery flatness.
Next it’ll be motor oil, screen wash, new wiper blades (one of them scratched my windscreen it seems) a cleaning mitt (for my son, because I truly am That Dad) and putting an extension cable through my window to run power outside so I can vacuum all the upholstery and use my air compressor to blow all the little nooks and crannies out to be free of all the inevitable nightmare shit that’s hiding in it.
And this is for Carlos. He’s a cheap little first car that “will do for now” (read: I am already too attached to him and hope to Hell he lasts a good long while before I mourn the loss one day as he croaks it) and already he’s cost me roughly £200 in random bits and bobs. Imagine how bad I’ll be if I ever get to owning Julia (this) or Brian (this). It’s gonna be awful.
The random bloggings of a guy.
